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Transcript:

Hi friends.

Annie F. Downs here. Can I just be Annie on Sundays? Would that be okay? This feels like friend talk anyways.

I’ve been wanting to tell you a fuller story of what’s coming up this fall in my life, specifically when it comes to where I’ll be living, and why.

Summary: I’m moving to New York City for two months. October and November. I’ll leave Nashville the first weekend of October when I leave to go to a speaking event up north, and then I will come back to Nashville after Thanksgiving.

I mentioned it in passing when I talked with Rebekah Lyons (that’s episode 466), but haven’t really taken time to explain or explore that with you. And I do think this is a with you moment. 

I’m thinking a lot about it… about how to share with you what I’m processing and learning and experiencing as this year plays out. Somewhat like ye olden days of blogging, but here instead. I want a place where I’m a little forced to write stories and tell you stories of this fall- of a new city, whether I feel like it or not. Social accountability-podcast accountability- is a powerful force.

So let’s start here. With the question that pops up all the time on my instagram posts.

Why am I moving to New York City for two months.

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I can’t really remember the first time I went to New York, I think it was in high school. I never considered living there, I never dreamed of it growing up. I watched all the same movies and shows- particularly You’ve Got Mail- 52 INSIGHTS INTO MY SOUL- and of course the city seems romantic in movies, but it didn’t make me want to live there.

But over the last decade, well, since 2010 actually, the more I’ve visited, the more I’ve seen it, the more I’ve spent time there with people who actually live there, it has taken over some real estate in my heart. I’ve written about this in multiple books- That Sounds Fun, Remember God I think?, and Looking For Lovely. The day I wrote about the community garden that’s in Looking For Lovely may be my very favorite writing day in my whole career.

I love New York. It matches my personality in a million ways. It’s so loud and busy and always, and well, me too. It lights me up. It doesn’t wear me out – yet. It also actually slows me down- I have to walk places and time things correctly and unlike here in Nashville, I can’t just race to my car and race to the next event. I actually really like the pace of New York and me. It’s everything they say in songs-

Concrete jungle where dreams are made of.

If you can make it there, you’ll make it anywhere.

And in the words of Taylor Swift, it’s a new soundtrack. I could dance to this beat.

So many of you know a lot of my dear friends there- people like Ginna Claire and Mary Kate from Wicked The Musical, Shauna Neiquist, her family, Jonathan Merritt, Jon Tyson, Meredith Toering… and a few others. And as I’ve spent time with them there, a little life has built for me. And many of you know my personal deep love for the Flatiron Building- it may be one of the most sacred spots for me and God. We’ve met there more than a few times and dreamed big in that park at the base of the building.

I’ve considered moving to New York City on and off through the years, but never pulled the trigger. Be it a budget decision or a dating relationship or a work commitment, it’s just never been the right yes. I’ve talked about it, with friends up there and friends down here, but never seriously considered it.

. . . . .

I was up there, this year, for New Years Eve. Sitting at the dinner table with Mary Kate and Ginna Claire and their husbands, Meredith and a few other friends, I said, kind of more to myself than anyone, “Man I love this place, I wish I lived here.”

And Mary Kate looked at me, nothing but kindness in her eyes and she said, “you know what’s funny? We’ve been friends for a lot of years and everything you say you are going to do, you actually do, except this.”

And it stopped me in my tracks. She’s right. I do try to be a woman of my word. And I knew that was a statement from a best friend inviting me to either change my choices or change my words. Do I REALLY want to move there or am I just going to keep saying it?

(Side note: either would have been fine. If I would have chosen just to quit saying it, that still makes me a woman of my word. It was just time to reckon with that.)

So the next day I called my friend Jonathan Merritt and told him what happened at the dinner table. He said, “I think you are on the line of I WOULD LOVE TO and I WISH I WOULD HAVE.”

Man, he was right. He is right.

I came home a little embarrassed, but mainly just between me and God. Like, “gosh have I missed this invitation before? Was I supposed to have already done this and I blew it?” 

And just real quietly, in my heart, I felt the Holy Spirit ask me back, “But have you ever heard me invite you like THIS?” And I hadn’t. It had never been so clear. The desire had always been there, but not an invitation like this.

This is where things get complicated though. I love Nashville. My life is here and my family is close. There are a lot of kids who depend on me to show up in their lives. I’m an ordained pastor at Cross Point Church and I’m committed to that house of worship. My office is here and our staff is here. I own a house here. My best friends are here or close. I love this place. I want to see and be a part of the flourishing of Nashville, Tennessee. I don’t want to move away.

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I sat down with my manager and business partner Kelli Haywood the next week of January, once we were back to work after the holidays. I knew my spring and summer calendar for 2023 were already set, but could I maybe go to New York for a month in the fall? 

“Why don’t you go for 2?” she offered. 

So I am. I found an apartment to rent. My friends are excited and so am I. I’ll still do my job, a little more of this type of writing and recording maybe?, but recording podcast episodes for That Sounds Fun, recording Let’s Read The Gospels, and maybe work on a few writing projects- I do my best consistent writing there. I will still travel and speak on a bunch of the weekends, and just fly in and out of LGA instead of BNA.

I’m scratching an itch long ignored, cracking open a dream long held, and chasing God to a new adventure I feel certain He’s invited me on.

And it was all going so well, just as planned for the last eight months, until I had surgery two weeks ago.

Not an emergency surgery, but a sudden one. The removal of a large ovarian cyst, my left ovary, and some other bits and bobs in there. (If this is your first time hearing of this, I told a lot of the story on instagram- just go there- @anniefdowns and look for the highlight with the cantaloupe emoji.) 

And I originally set out, today, to tell you some parts of the surgery story, and I’m sure I will here and there. But as I stood in my kitchen last night, reheating my dinner, and thinking through what I wanted to say, I realized that this surgery story is actually part of my New York City story. Because it is the portion of track right before the next station- Grand Central Station, I guess. This is part of how God has so kindly shaped my whole year. It has not been without pain or sadness- certainly we’ve all experienced that- I mean for heaven’s sake I’m still barely recovering from surgery- but it’s been a year of Proverbs 16:9… “a man (or in this case, a woman) plans their course, but the Lord determines their steps.”

I would not have planned an activity-limiting surgery weeks before moving to a pedestrian city. But having a massive cyst out of my body has already changed my body in amazing ways. (Yes, there’s a whole body story here that we should talk about at some point, remind me.) This is not the course I would have created, but it’s the Lord who has determined my steps.

And gracious, can you imagine if I hadn’t had the surgery done, the cyst removed, before moving? This surgery has given my body freedom it would not have had otherwise. I’m so grateful.

6 weeks from today will be my first day in New York. 6 weeks I planned to have packed with lunches and coffees and dinners with my friends here in Nashville to top up my friendship cup before being gone for two months. I planned to see absolutely everyone. But that won’t happen because a healing body doesn’t need to go at 100 miles per hour socially. I’ve grieved that this week, realizing that I’ll leave like a whisper, not a whirlwind. But I have to, to let my body heal.

So your AFD will be in NYC. And I don’t know all the whys, I don’t know what kinds of joys and sadnesses are to come, I don’t know what God has up His sleeves, but what I do know is that He has made a way for a little special dream in my heart to come to life, and I’ll be thankful 

forever. 

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So that’s the story. Did I leave anything out? Feel free to ask away over on instagram- @thatsoundsfunpodcast … and I’ll do my best to answer you there or use your question to springboard another little episode like this. Your thoughts and opinions are welcome and I’’ll see you tomorrow here on That Sounds Fun.

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